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Tuesday, September 3, 2013

On Living Broken…

My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit;
    a broken and contrite heart
    you, God, will not despise.
Psalms 51:17 (NIV)

You know how once something enters your life you can’t seem to escape it? When I finally accepted the reality of my brokenness, I began noticing consistent messages from The Universe about being broken AND that all would be well. I know that God speaks with many voices.  When you are present and paying attention, you might very well be surprised by from whence a message comes.

A couple days ago, I came across a poem by Rumi, 13th-century Persian poet, jurist, theologian, and Sufi mystic sent straight from the Heart of God. In one of his poems is the line, “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” BAM! 
Lord, please don’t fix me. I have embraced brokenness.  I need to know that
I could never be whole without You.

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” I’ve written so many times that breaking is a process, but it’s not just the breaking. It’s what happens next. Brokenness is that very point at which we meet God. Breaking signals the end of the path you’ve taken that no longer works.  Breaking means you’re done; out of ideas; out of gas. It’s the last stop before your first immersion in His Redeeming Love; the first time you figure out that whatever you’ve been doing isn’t working and the only way out is through your pain and into His Arms. Breaking opens up that places in us where the Light may enter.

Matthew Henry, in commentary on Psalms 51 writes the “psalmist prays for mercy, humbly confessing and lamenting his sins. He pleads for pardon, that he may promote the glory of God.” David is broken, spent, and begging that the humble sacrifice of the shards of  his life would be an acceptable offering before God. I get that.

So here is my re-affirmation. Lord, please don’t fix me. I have embraced my brokenness and appreciate that I needed it for so many reasons.  I needed to know, from my head down through to my soul that I could never be whole without You. In the words of one of my favorite songs, Nothing Without Your Love by Richard Smallwood and Vision, Sin ti soya nada…Necesito tu amor, Senor. (I am nothing without You…I need your love, Lord.) Brokenness reminds me that the fall from my failing capacity to Your Amazing Grace is a journey for which I’d trade nothing. I wouldn’t have room for Your Light otherwise…

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OneWord 2015

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