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Saturday, August 4, 2012

(more about being) Here…

Teach them to do everything I have commanded you. "And remember that I am always with you until the end of time."
Matthew 28:20 (GWT)

The end of my day, a couple days ago, was not my finest moment. Thank God for LisaJo Baker and Five Minute Fridays, a commitment to prayerful morning meditation and Karen Clark Sheard singing “God is here” on my run the next morning. Had I not lived through it all, I wouldn’t have had the breakthrough.

I melted down a couple nights ago. I was tired. I should know better, but I am flawed and frail and “beautifully human.” That is not the end of the lesson. Being broken focused my attention. It positioned me to hear and receive the words of this song as I ran…letting me know that being here was okay…

O come and lay down the burdens you have carried
For in the sanctuary God is here.
He is here, He is here
To break the yoke and lift the heavy burden
He is here, He is here
To heal the hopeless heart and bless the broken.
O come and lay down the burdens you have carried
For in the sanctuary God is here
From the God is here, by Martha Munizzi

I ran and I wept. I wept for the forgiveness I felt washing over me. I wept in gratitude that one tantrum doesn’t define who I am. I wept that a good night’s sleep had already made it better, and gasped at the messages God was sending me that it was already okay, He’d already been in the Here I was just coming to…I remembered reading, “don’t confuse your path with your destination. Just because it’s stormy now doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for sunshine” reminding me again that being here was okay.

Last week I read, “Surrender can be the sweetest thing. Practice surrender and let the Universe do its work." The unkown author of this piece of wisdom didn't write it for me. When I collected it to ponder over and unpack later I didn't know when or how desperately I'd need it, but Thank You, Lord. You knew I'd get here. More importantly, You knew I'd run weeping into Your arms because You've been Here all the time. 

I’m grateful for the breakdown. I’m grateful for the lesson. I don’t mind falling when the lesson is “you will get up.” I don’t mind falling when He’s already told me, “lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." So I will be more careful, to mind my words and manage my energy. To measure twice and cut once with my words and deeds. But I will remember what my wise and wonderful mother said to me just a few days ago..."we are standing on Holy Ground, even when we move, because God is here." 

A breakthrough and a hard landing, but into a sacred place...an abiding reminder that God is good."  

OneWord 2015

OneWord 2015

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