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Thursday, June 21, 2012

Slow down or else…

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28 (NIV)

During periods of intense stress, when I appear to be capably holding it together, I seem physically invincible.  I take rest, eat well, exercise.  No matter how gracefully I manage under pressure, when the pressure gives way, I usually give out. You’d think at my age I’d be smarter about this, or at least learn to recognize the signs, but I never seem to remember until it’s much too late. Today was my latest wakeup call.  I should learn to slow down or else...

I was feeling signs of tension last night at a meeting, and while I tried to manage them, I didn’t give it too much thought.  I awakened this morning with a blinding migraine, the likes of which I haven’t seen in several months. The accompanying nausea means the headache is going to be a real monster, and one of two things will happen…a) I will throw up and feel better, or b) I will throw up and still have a migraine.  I should learn to slow down. 

Today I had no choice.  I managed to get dressed and drive the children safely to school. I went back to bed, moving only to let the dog relieve himself (no long walk today, puppy baby), and finally to feed him.  My trips were from the bedroom to the bathroom, and back.  I have got to learn to slow down.

I have learned to yield.  I have learned to chill, but I haven’t quite mastered letting it go.  Just as I was about to become prideful about “figuring it out” I got my wakeup call.  Be Still.  Slow Down.  Or else.
Lord, I’ve given You all the glory for the Grace You’ve given me to manage all that’s been on my plate, but my plate grew heavy because I put too much on it.  It’s no longer good enough to be still when I can.  I’ve got to learn to simply Be Still.

“Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”  According to Gill’s Exposition, rest is defined as,
spiritual rest here, peace of conscience, ease of mind, tranquility of soul, through an application of pardoning grace, a view of free justification by the righteousness of Christ, and full atonement of sin by his sacrifice; and eternal rest hereafter, in Abraham's bosom, in the arms of Jesus, in perfect and uninterrupted communion with Father, Son, and Spirit.
That’s chill for real.  So, just about the time I start feeling “some type of way” as we say, I got that tap on the shoulder, or in my case, as serious knock to the head.  I’m feeling better now, able to sit up for longer periods than at any other time today.  (Yeah, this headache was THAT bad…) Lord, I’d like to learn to get it right before the wakeup calls come.  This isn’t fun. I can do better.  I will do better.  I will chill for real. 

Tomorrow will be better.  (Yoga for sure.)  I have not honored my body the way I should and it told on me.  One wakeup call is enough; message received.  Tomorrow will be better, I will simply Be Still. Tomorrow, I’m looking for some spiritual rest, peace of conscience, ease of mind, tranquility of the soul, and I’m not running like a fool to go get it.  I will simply seek Him, and get mine…that simple.

A migraine can be a blessing if it brings you to your knees and your senses.  Even through my pain, I am reminded that my cup is never empty.  I remember that God is good.

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